This isn’t the baby I wanted.
I can’t believe you did this to me.
After he and Diane walked out, the room was so silent I could hear the clock on the wall ticking. The nurse in purple scrubs helped me get Evelyn latched. She didn’t ask questions. She just kept saying, “You’re doing great, Mama. You’re doing so great.”
I wasn’t doing great. I was shaking so hard my teeth were clicking together.
“Did he say what I think he said?” I asked her.
She hesitated. “I’m sorry, honey.”
“I don’t understand. I don’t understand what happened.”
She tucked the blanket around Evelyn’s feet. “Sometimes people react badly in the delivery room. All the stress. The emotions. Maybe he just needs some time.”
But I had seen his face. That wasn’t stress. That was something else. That was a man who had just found out something terrible.
